12 Years and counting…

~ David Willis ~ Leave a comment

Anybody who has been around me for any amount of time know this about me: I am passionate about my marriage. I am married to a wonderful woman. She is beautiful and smart, funny and sexy, thoughtful and witty, and the best friend I have ever had. These things make it  easy to be passionate about my marriage to her. But, truth be told though, I would be passionate about my marriage even if she wasn’t some of those things.

I have a bold statement to make. One that I know many people will not believe. Marriage is not broken. People are. Marriage works. What do I mean by this? Simply that. It works. It is one of the most awesome experiences of my life and it works just fine, if we work on it. If we submit ourselves to the process, marriage most certainly works. You don’t always get your way. You compromise. You find solutions that work for both of you. And you learn that all of that is a very good thing.

I married my best friend 12 years ago this month. We have been through a lot of life in those 12 years and we are happier today than we have ever been. Taking a brief glance back it might be hard to see how. There have been deaths in the family. Both of her grandmas, her dad, her mom, and me have all been through bouts with cancer. (Her parents and I are out on the other side cancer free. We miss both of her grandmas dearly). There have been hard times. We tried to get pregnant with our son for over 5 years. Money has been tight at times. Life has bombarded us from all sides. I wouldn’t choose to do it any other way.

For as much hard times there have been awesome times too. We spent time on our anniversary day (January 9) remembering about our wedding day. We looked at where we were (see above…did I really ever have that much hair?!!) and where we have come. We have walked with each other. We have loved each other. We have enjoyed each other. We have shared our hopes and dreams. We have helped each other make some of those come true. We have much to celebrate.

In marrying one another we made each other a promise that we would walk with each other through the good times and hard times, remaining faithful to each other. We chose each other that day twelve years ago. We have made that choice, and will make that choice, every day forward. I chose to be her husband. She chose to be my wife. No second chances. No do overs. I wouldn’t have it any other way.

The sense of wonder hasn’t left me either. With each year that passes I am still amazed and still so very thankful to God that she is the one I get to spend my life with.

Why do we fall down?

~ David Willis ~ 4 Comments

I have been a comic book fan for as long as I can remember. Good versus evil. Right overcoming wrong. Justice for the underdog. My heart is stirred by those themes. One of my all time favorites is Batman. I mean, who doesn’t love Batman? (Um…bear with me….)

I am not talking about the 1960’s Boom Pow Zap Holy Everything Batman. I am talking about the Batman from the comic book. The character who experienced loss as a child in the murder of his parents and works to bring those who would perpetrate the same to justice. The character was very accurately (in my mind) portrayed in the movie Batman Begins. A young Bruce Wayne is angry and unfocused, but finds his calling in defending Gotham.

One line stuck with me from the movie. You see in a flashback to Bruce Wayne’s past a conversation he has with his father. His dad asks him this: ‘Why do we fall down Bruce? So we can learn to pick ourselves back up again.’

I have been thinking hard about my life this month. I have made the choice to give my best this year and to live my life on purpose. I am realizing in the pursuit of that goal I am going to fall down a lot. The bad thing about goals for the New Year is we don’t suddenly become different people on January 1st. We just are more hopeful with the prospect of a clean slate.

It takes a lot of determination and guts to envision the life you want and then take progressive steps to see that vision carried out. What you don’t see is all the times the successful people you know almost threw in the towel, but didn’t. They persevered. Every time life knocks them down they get back up.

Maybe that is why I like super heroes as much as I do. They don’t give in. They don’t surrender. They get back up when they fall down. Good wins over evil. Gotham is saved for another day. And they get to wear a cool utility belt that does everything from opening bottles to vaccinating for the flu…You know what I mean.

Why do we fall down? So we can pick ourselves back up again. To get anywhere worth going you have to.

A Friday Evening Feast

~ David Willis ~ Leave a comment

I do my best to not be part of the ‘Oh, lord it’s Monday…Thank God, it’s Friday’ crowd. I think that attitude makes us miss a lot of important stuff that goes on during the week. At the very least, we don’t get the kind of enjoyment out of life that we can. With that being said, I was very excited that it was Friday a couple of days ago. Why? It was time for seeing good friends and having some home made Mexican food.

I got a little more ambitious than normal and made the following: Chicken and Beef Fajitas, Fried Jalapeños, Fresh Squeezed Limeade, and Tex-Mex Sundaes. I had a blast. Since I covered the jalepenos in a different post, I am going to focus on the limeade and the Tex-Mex Sundaes. (We will save the fajitas for another time!) All in all I was in the kitchen for about three hours.

I found the limeade recipe through Chef Rick Bayless. It is the perfect blend of sweet and tart and absolutely refreshing. It is also very easy to make. It takes the juice of 6-8 limes, a cup and a half of sugar, and a quart of sparkling water. Give it a try and you won’t be disappointed. One word of caution though, the sugar will react with the sparkling water and create quite a mess if you aren’t careful!

The Tex-Mex Sundae is courtesy of Paula Deen. It is all kinds of awesome. It is a wonderful blend of textures. It starts with a base of a fried tortilla that is then sprinkled with cinnamon and sugar. On top of that put 2-3 scoops of homemade cinnamon ice cream. The recipe calls for a topping of chocolate syrup and a cherry. I have taken a little creative license and have topped it in a few different ways. I like the chocolate syrup topped with whipped cream. Marixa doesn’t want chocolate syrup at all, but prefers a strawberry sauce over the top with whipped cream on top of that.

The strawberry sauce can be made by thawing a package of frozen strawberries, adding 2 tablespoons of lemon juice and half a cup to a cup of powdered sugar. You don’t want to make the sauce too sweet or it will mask the flavor of the sundae.

Overall, I would call Friday night a success. Everyone enjoyed the food and that is what we cook for isn’t it? I continue to be amazed at how food can bring people together. It can be a very intimate time that is shared among friends. I am very thankful for this. It is one of the reasons I enjoy cooking as much as I do.

I have to see the path in front of me…

~ David Willis ~ Leave a comment

I have a confession to make. I am a free spirit and I get very little done when left to my own devices. I have to have structure. I have to have a map. Or, I spin my wheels, do a few donuts, crash, and get nothing productive done. (I have never mastered the art of the donut…granted Oklahoma doesn’t get that much ice so I haven’t had too much time to practice….anyway.) I have to have structure. I have to know what is expected, even if I am the one outlining the expectations.

I got a wonderful reminder of this fact this evening. Marixa and I sat down together and took a look at my goals and my to do list. I have some pretty big long term goals and I needed to take a look at them and start planning my short term goals. For weeks I have been coming into my office to work (after the family goes to bed) and I haven’t been getting much done. Everything had gotten jumbled and I couldn’t see the next step. It was frustrating. I knew what I wanted in the long term, but seeing the short term was not coming easy. Marixa helped me clear all of that up in about 45 minutes of brainstorming. (Thanks my love. I needed that.)

By giving me a clear picture of the path ahead (or at least the next few steps) I see the purpose in what I am doing. If I can see that what I am doing today makes a difference in where I want to be in a year, that gets me exited. The progress may be slow and steady, but progress is progress.

I am also finding another benefit of creating structure: it frees me up to be creative without a side helping of guilt. Every time I sit down in the office I feel like I should be doing something else. However, when I have the structure in place, I know what I have to get done. I have allotted time slots for the work. I get to work and create and enjoy the process. I give myself permission during those times to work with a singular focus. There are other things that have to be done (some that would seem more pressing), but not right now. Not while I am working within the time I have allotted, because I see the path in front of me and I am going to walk it without distraction. Johann Von Goethe said it more eloquently : Things which matter most should never be at the mercy of things which matter least. Things that don’t matter want to get in the way of things that do matter. We can’t have that.

What is your process for getting things done? What road blocks have you hit? What have you set in place to help you achieve  your goals?

 

Pasta Ponza and Fried Jalapenos.

~ David Willis ~ Leave a comment

These two food items have nothing to do with each other, except that they were both cooked in my kitchen this evening. To some success, I might add. We have been on a quest around my house to explore new recipes and we are finding some good ones. The Pasta Ponza was no exception.

Pasta Ponza

Ok. What is Pasta Ponza? Here is your answer (Courtesy of Giada De Laurentiis).Yellow and red grape tomatoes (2 cups of each) spread out over the bottom of a buttered 8 x 8 dish (the recipe called for capers as well, but I didn’t have them). On top of the tomatoes goes a tablespoon of olive oil, salt and pepper, and half a cup of Italian bread crumbs. Drizzle olive oil over the top of the bread crumbs and bake for 30-35 minutes at 375 degrees. While that is going cook penne pasta (1 pound) al dente. Reserve a cup of the noodle water to add to the dish at the end. Strain the pasta, put in a bowl, cover with tomato/breadcrumb mixture. Toss with 1 1/4 cups of Romano or Parmasean cheese. Add the cup of noodle water for good consistency. It was very tasty. A much better attempt than the blog post previous to this one…

Okra Fried Jalapenos

So, where do the jalapenos fit in? I went to my favorite Mexcian grocery store the other day for a bit of retail therapy (which usually involves spending about 10 bucks on produce and other authentic ingredients) and came out with a bag full of jalepenos. The were 2 pounds for a buck, so I got more than I needed. They were sitting on my counter this evening going bad and I had a brilliant idea. I sliced them up like pieces of Okra, breaded them, and fried them. I used Paula Deen’s awesome fried okra recipe for the breading. I took one bite and whoa! I sounded like Homer Simpson finding a long lost donut. The savory element of Paula Deen’s seasoning added to the spicy of the jalapeno was awesome.

These two don’t really belong on the same plate together, but they can hang out in my kitchen on the same night again any  time they want to. Sometime trying new things is like this though. One form of creativity leads to another. And sometimes necessity demands creativity. Either way, it was a good evening in the kitchen. It makes me look forward to getting back into the kitchen tomorrow.